Breaking news,
A large grizzly bear was found roaming the streets of Tripoli. Said bear was found to speak! Unfortunately no one could understand the bears deafening cries. However, researchers on board the Greek vessel C.R.V Papadapolus (not to be confused with the Papad police, you know, those working in certain restaurants, who do not give you an extra papad in "plate meals")sailing in the Mediterranean Sea were in an ideal position to listen and record these rantings. They were stunned when they were able to recognize a few English phrases in all the gibberish. Our intrepid reporters listened to this recording and all they could make out were the words, Suppress Oppress and Depress.
Eye witnesses have described this ursine entity to sketch artists who have then created an image of what this entity could look like. Those readers who are currently in the vicinity of North Africa should exercise caution -and wear ear plugs and avoid banana bajji at all costs.
Sources in high places (ie those up a tree hiding from this creature) tell us that this bear like creature could be among the many mercenaries hired by the Qaddafi - the man who put the dick in dic(k)tator to, you guessed it, suppress oppress and depress his subjects.
I didn't know you could suppress, oppress and depress subjects, in school it was the subjects that suppressed oppressed and depressed me. Especially maths.
Other sources tell us that this is a complete lie, this entity is merely a tourist stuck in Libya,who is looking for some food.
Further sources tell us that the entity is merely looking for the editor of a certain Tamil magazine which shall remain nameless. They also tell us that there are WMDs in Iraq and the Yeti married the third cousin of the Abominable snowman (or snowperson to be politically correct, as this post is mainly about politics). As of now this whole thing remains unclear.
Watch this space for more.
An "artist's rendition" of entity is given below.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
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