Tuesday, September 30, 2003

what all can you do with an anvil and some explosives..for further information contact
c/o ACME Co.
The Road Runner Show.
You can learn a lot about a person,especially if you take the time to inject them with Sodium Pentothal.
Calvin What's it like to fall in love?
Hobbes Well... Say the object of your affection walks by...
Calvin Yeah?
Hobbes First, your heart falls into your stomach and splashes your innards. All the moisture makes you sweat profusely. This condensation shorts the circuits to your brain, and you get all woozy. When your brain burns out altogether, your mouth disengages and you babble like a cretin until she leaves.
Calvin That's love?!?
Hobbes Medically speaking.
Calvin Heck, that happened to me once, but I figured it was cooties!
+why me
* why not?
i am a simple man with complex tastes............calvin
sniff sniff....aah, there it is the sweet ,sweet scent of freedom.
i can hear the wind rustling throught the birds,the chirping of the trees.
help. take me stoned im home.
quick quick , if you want to live hold your breath.
the logic being..when you take in air into your lungs,you inspire...
so if you let the air out........ you expire.
Bond should be Sean and not heard.

Monday, September 29, 2003


"It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether
I win or lose."

Friday, September 26, 2003

Dr. Jones fell in the well
and died without a moan.
He should have tended to the sick
and left the well alone. ........Harry Graham
maths, for me, is counting on my fingers. Advanced maths involves toes.
The heights by great men reached and kept, were not attained by sudden flight.But they, while thier companions slept were toiling upward through the night....
and i always thought they were in the toilet upstairs throughout the night. or as some dude said toileting upstairs through the night.
Light travels faster than sound.

This is why some people appear bright until you hear
them speak.

Ha! they have removed that horrible fence from Tank Bund. Ha!

Wednesday, September 24, 2003

just because i said tight security doesnt mean you get the watchman drunk!!!

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

Nasheet: ok this ones 4 u: unlike otherz ur brain is a masterpiece ......its divided into 2 halves: the right and the left ....the left has nothin right in it and the right has nothin left in it!!!!!11
A : lol
Is man one of God's blunders or is God one of man's blunders? ......allegedly Nietzsche
How long were you in chennai?
the same as here 5 foot 10"
in the immortal words of charlie brown.
"Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.' "

i have a headache.
unless you are ravana or zaphod beeblebrox u would have "ek" head.
what would ravana do if he had a headache in all his heads.
apply emami mentho plus balm or havent you been watching tv.
junta in class distributed sweets today..guess why....come on..guess.........
ok ill tell.....it was because tomorrow sees the relese of teh movie "Tagore"
*ing none other than superstar,megha star, the one and only Chiranjeevi.
hehe.. but im not complaining i got a free chocolate.

Monday, September 22, 2003

speaking of which ....

Mary had a little lamb,
she ate it with mint sauce.
and every where that Mary went , the lamb went too of course!
Allright when mary had a little lamb the doctor was shocked but blimey he didnt 'alf 'ave a stroke when ole macdonald had a farm.

Sunday, September 21, 2003

speaking of alter egos
do priests have alter egos?
A kingdom, A kingdom. My horse for a kingdom.
Shaikh Spear must be turning cartwheels in his grave by now. well im not the first person to murder shakespeare(even if he died hazaar years before)

Saturday, September 20, 2003

Lotsa ppl must've heard of the concept of milliHelens. well helen(of troy) had the face that launched a thousand ships. so ppl grade faces on that scale. ex a face with 500 millihelens.potential to launch 500 ships etce tc..u get it.
now what is interesting is the new concept researcher working at the dept of chem in OU (namely yours truly and imaginary friend) is the concept of nelehs
(the carefull observer might note that this is helen spelled ulta) this is capacity of a face to sink a thousand ships.one millineleh is the capacity of a face to sink a single ship.etcetc.so it goes...comments any one,.

Friday, September 19, 2003

hello!!! why are my posts disapearing??
Sabu apply formula number 44*

*chacha chaudhari's brain works faster than a computer.

unfortunately the only computer whose speed i am even remotely near is teh ENIAC.
the magic 8 ball

Thursday, September 18, 2003

speaking of haiti..they had this voodoo tradition of inviting thier enemies over to eat in the late afternoons this became such a major part of thier culture that they called thier country after it...u know Haiti (high tea)
Why did the chicken cross the road?

Part of a the CIA's specially trained elite team of fowl, this stealthy chicken is on a perilous misson.
His object? No less than to uncover the secret documents of the infamous Polish scientist, Dr. Poppycockski.
Dr. Poppycockski, code name: Cock, has outlandish, yet devilsihly clever plans for total world domination, which begin with the great nation of Haiti.
The bank called..katte. my reality check bounced

Sunday, September 14, 2003

Q. How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Bananna
What is grosser than gross?

A pancake that has fallen on the kitchen floor and you are very hungry for a pancake, but when you pick the pancake up you find the gooey syrup and the creamy butter are like flypaper and so your spongey, yummy pancake is covered in lint, dustmites, a splotch of still-moist mustard from the night before, a broken match, a dirty fingernail, and of course millions of squirming, pulsing bacteria. Also: the pancake now smells like bellybutton, so you puke. But your stomach is empty so you dry heave, and now the pancake is covered in your early morning bile. Anyway, you're so hungry so you eat the pancake.

Man, that is totally gross.

was reminded of that ancient joke....
If people from Poland are called Poles.what are people from Holland called?
.........by the way meet my friend Mr Lal.Mr Lal is a communist.........
Kaun Beej bota hai yaaron,Phal ye kaun chakhe.
Yeh jag jantar mantar maya, kaun yeh khel rache.

Kaun chadhae roj ye suraj, pavan kaun phuke.
............Kaun (Indian Ocean)
...and the donga dimakh works overtime.

Wednesday, September 10, 2003

hamne suna that sabar ka phal meetha hota hai..
Ye Sabar ka phal kya cheez hai?hamne to seb, anar , kela suna hai.

Tuesday, September 09, 2003

Carry me, caravan.
Take me away.
Take me to Portugal.
Take me to Spain.
With fields full of grain,
I have to see you
Again and again.
Take me, Spanish caravan.
Yes, I know you can.

Trade winds find Galleons
Lost in the sea.
I know where treasure
Is waiting for me.
Silver and gold
In the mountains of Spain,
I have to see you
Again and again.
Take me, Spanish caravan.
Yes, I know you can................Spanish Caravan(The Doors)
Two minutes silence...My phone died.
Well, talking bout how the meaning of it all lies in the hedge at the bottom of someones garden.
*then why arent gardeners wise?
well, they are.gardeners are enlightened.
yup.working so many hours in the sun they are definitely "enlightened"
* *pukes*
id love to....but im teaching my ferret to yodel and i cant make it.

Monday, September 08, 2003

I am joining the DNA....the National Association of Dyslexics.

Sunday, September 07, 2003

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ........Socrates
You can fool some of the people all the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.
.....sometimes I feel like the aforementioned one legged man in an arse kicking contest.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.
-- Douglas Adams

Thursday, September 04, 2003

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock,
will prevent you from rolling over and going back to
sleep when you hit the snooze button.

Possibly for the first time in my life academics has overtaken everything else(well not much of a choice when you consider college always finishes after 5)
anyway all this hard work is good for health, but so is karela, and u dont see ppl lining up to eat raw karela now do you? eh?eh?personally i wouldnt even eat cooked karela.

Monday, September 01, 2003

There is a theory which states that if any one discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here,it will instantly disappear and be replaced by someting even more bizzare and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
................(from The Restraurant at the End of the Universe. by Douglas Adams)
as some great philosophet once said (when he was stoned)."the meaning of it all,lies in the hedge at the bottom of the garden". alrighty.......problem is...which garden?.